Self-deception at its best

Best WTH lines I have heard so far:

1. “Dating while you’re married isn’t cheating”. Explaining some of the difficulties of a marriage after years of divorce. Grounds for divorce: not performing marital duties! WHAT? “Oh really? No sex for you? Uh, perhaps the key reason for that is that they were dating while you both were married”.

weddgring

2. “Found out he is married, living with her and is expecting a kid with her, but we are going to go ahead with planning our wedding”. After hiring a private investigator, crashing his car & wrecking his apartment (after breaking & entering).

3. “I know that we are different religions and that everyone has turned their backs on us, but it’ll work out”. One year and several re-locations later, “We got divorced”. What? “Yeah, turns out her family had a hit out on me!”.

4. “She’s a little too much to handle sometimes, but I’m getting used to it”. After throwing F bombs & Christmas gifts across the room at her in-laws. The trigger phrase: “You didn’t have to get us anything, your presence is gift enough!”.

5. “I don’t bring my partner to any of my social engagements because I don’t want anyone knowing my business”. As they tweet, instagram and fb throughout the entire night enough information that if the cops needed information about their whereabouts, it would suffice.

34 thoughts on “Self-deception at its best

  1. hmmm….I’ve heard these before. I always loved the married man as, before you’re about to jump into bed with, telling you he’s married but his wife won’t do that in bed….wtf?!

    1. Love it! How did I forget this one? LOL Have to tell you that your talent is impeccable! Who else other then you can talk about bacon, gratitude poetry and 4 square divorce with such regalia?

      Thank you so much for the follow! Looking forward to your posts!

  2. Fantastic! finaly sombody is talking about what real problamatic relationships contain, instead of sugar coating. Bravo! Encore !

    1. LOL! Thanks so much! Yeah for some reason, it’s only on the original page. I couldn’t find it on yours. Thank you for sharing it!!!

    1. Ha ha! Glad you can appreciate the ridiculousness! The next time you are doing radio/tv, post it up here so we can all support it!

  3. I’m impressed, I must say. Seldom do I come across a blog that’s both educative and entertaining, and let me tell you,
    you’ve hit the nail on the head. The problem is something not enough people are speaking intelligently about. Now i’m very happy
    that I came across this in my hunt for something relating to this.

        1. lol My favorite’s are #1 and #5. Especially #5. Cracks me up. Your social streams are flooded with every move you make, what you eat, where you are, who you’re with… but, you don’t want people in your business?!?!?!?!

        2. lol My favorite’s are #1 and #5. Especially #5. Cracks me up. Your social streams are flooded with every move you make, what you eat, where you are, who you’re with… but, you don’t want people in your business?!?!?!?!

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