For many, the holidays are times to celebrate family, life, love, and personal goals. However, when you’re single it can be a time of anxiety. It’s a reminder that you are single; either because you are around family or because your family reminds you of the fact. So, what do most people do? Try to fill that void by entertaining the idea of getting back with an ex.
Here are some things that you can remind yourself to prevent you from returning to a failed relationship:
What you do: Although it may be difficult, try not to reminisce about the relationship. When you do that you are only extracting the moments of the relationship you want to remember that were about companionship. You are recalling only the things that created an illusion of belongingness.
What you can do instead: Weigh out the reasons that you are no longer together, when you start to think that they should be back in your life.
What you do: Although the holidays might be emotional for you, remember that most of the world knows pain. Remind yourself of those that have endured different pain e.g. those that go without water or access to food.
What you can do instead: Perhaps volunteer at a local non-profit organization or attend a charity event.
What you do: Try to avoid stalking your ex on social networks. This only stagnates your growth because it occupies your brain with thoughts about your exes’ activities and whereabouts. Instead of mentally preparing yourself for a better relationship and a more realized version of yourself.
What you can do instead: Remind yourself that they are an ex for a reason.