YOU'RE JUST A DUMBASS

Stop the head games you play with yourself!

yourejustadumbass

Just because you had a negative experience doesn’t mean that you’re going to have another bad experience. I have often said that relationships should leave visible scars rather than psychological scars. Simply because physical scars heal within a specific time and sometimes are reminders of what not to do, while psychological scars can act in the complete opposite where you can become imprisoned in your mind and body.

Here are some tips on how to avoid the head games you play with yourself:

  1. One of the key elements about a relationship is that it should make you a better version of yourself. If that is not happening, you have to exit while you still recognize yourself.
  2. You allow yourself to be used. Ask yourself why you allowed it in this case and not others or why you continuously let them use you.
  3. There is a reciprocal nature to the universe. Let the universe take care of it. Don’t ruminate about the relationship.
  4. Don’t victimize yourself post break up.
  5. Don’t relive negative events that occurred in the relationship by recalling what happened or extract an aspect to persecute yourself over again. You’re torturing yourself & subsequently delaying your own growth.
  6. Don’t lie to yourself. One of the keys is that you have to be honest with yourself and in defining your truth; you have to come to terms with it.
  7. People are who they are, not what you want you want them to be or what you would like to see them become.
  8. Don’t ascribe unrealistic expectations to people. People’s reality is shaped by their experiences which shapes their perception.
  9. No repeat performances. Time post break up simply created distance, not fondness. They are your exes for a reason. You keep moving forward, not backwards. Re-read #6.
  10. Develop further or refine your list of what is compatible for you.
  11. Further refine your happiness hypothesis.
  12. If it reached your threshold of what’s unacceptable, it’s unacceptable. Some people dismiss porn being played in the background while you’re trying to have a conversation, some dismiss cheating. It all depends on your tolerance level. None of it is wrong because it’s how you define your happiness.