Ladies, beware: men are the new women!

Ok, so, when I learned that Spanx, Inc. makes shape wear for men, I couldn’t stop laughing. Not that it’s not a great concept because IT IS! But, that there’s the metrosexual, manscaping, calf implants, and manx! What’s next? Men, enjoy the objectification that women have endured for years! You’re gonna love being told you aren’t good enough and that everything about you has to change.

Let’s begin with examples of our theme: men are the new women. The following list classifies some of the types of new modern man that are seeking someone that can deal with their emotional cycles, insecurities, and rants.

The pity seeker.

This guy chalks his life setbacks and experiences to a series of bad luck. Somehow things don’t pan out for him, yet he doesn’t understand how these things keep happening to him. Watching this guy make attempts that don’t materialize makes it hard to think about a future with him. The draw about this guy is that you really feel for him because you want him to succeed at what he does and these types really want to be a good partner because he wants to please you. The flip-side of that is he likes being a victim in life because he is used to instability in his career, life goals attainment, whatever else he sees as failures. He will be insecure throughout the relationship and when you break up he will seek pity from others by vilifying you.

The jealous types.

This guy is outwardly projecting solid and strength, but internally very insecure. There are a few subtypes within this category.  There’s the overbearing and domineering type that wants your cell phone to review your call and text history because he has deep seated trust issues. Then, there’s the guy who thinks that everyone you encounter wants to be with you and let’s you know about it. He is actually secretly jealous of you because of his inability to deal with his own insecurities and can’t deal with your ability to command your life. He doesn’t see where he fits, so he creates one. Both types seem appealing because initially they both come off as very reliable and loyal. Unfortunately, these types can become abusive.

The socially inept type.

This guy feels very uncomfortable in social settings because they are used to interacting with a computer screen and have lost their ability to interact with humans. In addition to know knowing how to function in social settings, they are also oblivious to social cues and are unable to read human behavior appropriately. These guys usually have an equally inept social circle, if they have one. Initially the draw might be the shyness, but their social awkwardness usually stems from childhood. These guys deal with their emotions via their Facebook walls because that is their support network. This guy will break up with you via text/email.

About these ads

39 comments

  1. I am sure that I suck in a million and one ways, yet… they are all hideous and I hate them. That said, I rejoined POF since I am an optimist, or a masochist. Keep mixing those up.

    1. No, not at all-you are fine! It’s all probability & another method of meeting people at the end of the day. All we can do is try to weed out the ones that are completely not worth the effort! But, as you know, sometimes we learn the hard way. But, I like to still be optimistically analytical :)

  2. The “pity seeker” is usually highly likely to be a male feminist too. I think that would require an entire PhD thesis!

    1. Oh, absolutely! They are chameleons; they’ll adapt to whatever the person they are with is. Sharing the ideals of feminism is an extension of their appeal factor. But, all for manipulative purposes.

      Clearly, manipulation is the consistent quality all 3 possess.

      You are so right-one could write exclusively & extensively on just one characteristic each type possesses.

  3. I’ve been saying this for awhile now. Pretty much since the day I started working at a male prison. You definitely hit the hammer square on its head. Never heard so much whining which I guess would fall under Pity seekers. :-))

    1. Thank you so much for your comment and affirmation! LOL I think that has more to do with the environment, life choices, and associations they’ve made throughout their lives. :)
      But in all seriousness, I can’t classify any of these types of men as becoming more emotionally intelligent.

  4. Fairly good breakdown, but you forgot a few.

    1. Doesn’t Know He’s Gay Guy
    2. Receeding Gums Guy
    3. Thinks He’s A Genius But Works At Sears Guy
    4. Balding At 20 Guy
    5. Milk Jug Of Water At The Gym Guy
    6. Adult Acne Guy
    7. Wanna Be Don Draper Guy
    8. Hipster Asshole Guy
    9. Looks Like The Alien From “Fire In The Sky” Guy
    10. ED Happens To Everyone Guy

  5. Having just re-entered the dating scene after 25+ years, all I can say is “You are so right.” Maybe it’s unique to me, but all that it seems I run across are confident, secure women. I’m not complaining but I’m beginning to feel like it’s ME who’s the more emotional and flighty one. I don’t think I fit any of the 3 horrible examples of men that you list but it’s definitely a new world out there. As you write, “What’s next?” I shudder to think.

    1. Thank you so much for your insightful comments. For you, it might be about aggrandizing back into the dating scene. You are learning new women:) Doesn’t seem like you are what I was thinking about when I wrote the article! Seems to me that you are learning both about yourself and what you need! The dating scene has changed, yet still remains the same. We have to adapt to the new methods and how life changes the amount of time we have to meet people as we get older. Glad you stopped by. I hope this blog can help along the way :)

      1. Thanks. I’d like to think that I’m not any of those three types but I’m probably more like:

        The dazed and confused guy
        .
        This guy thought he had a clue as to how the world works but upon re-entering the dating scene after almost 30 years now realizes that Men are the New Women and vice versa. He’s trying to figure out if his health insurance covers calf implants and is planning to get some Manx underwear in the near future.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s